{Humility}

Humbled.

One day last week, I woke up with anxiety and stress about so many things.  Car insurance. A child's health concerns. Lesson plans. Taxes. My to-do list. The phone bill.

I posted about some of this on Instagram, followed my own de-stress checklist, and went about my day.  I accomplished a few things on my to-do list, and my anxiety began to ease.  As I reminded myself of God's goodness and His provision throughout my day, pieces of the puzzle of life seemed to fall into place.  I am always humbled and amazed by His provision.

Fast forward through my day, to our evening prayer meeting.  I was still struggling with some worry and stress, leftovers from a long day at work.  As is our custom, we began our prayer time by thanking God for His goodness, and showing our gratitude toward Him for all He has done and all He is.  

One of our church members began to pray, and once again, I was humbled.  Russell* is a faithful member of our church.  He doesn't have a lot.  He shares a small apartment with a couple of other guys.  He rides his bike to and from our meetings, and with the 20 plus inches of snow that we've gotten in the last two weeks, he's had to rely on others for rides.  One Sunday, I overheard him telling another church member how his phone had been shut off for a few days, but then he had gotten paid, so it was turned back on.  I don't know Russell extremely well, but well enough to know that he probably has more in his life to stress about than I do.  

At prayer, Russell began to pray, giving thanks to God for all He is, for how good He is, and I could tell that his words came from a deeply grateful heart.  I was humbled.  All the things that I had worried about earlier faded away.  Here I was, worrying about how the new phone that *I* chose, I CHOSE to get was going to cost xxx more dollars per month, and yet here is Russell, who has so much less than I do, pouring out his heart of thankfulness and gratitude toward a loving God.

Humbled.  Wrecked.  Aware of my own privilege.  Aware of my own need of a loving and forgiving God.  And so thankful to Him for opening my eyes.